District 63 Students Learn Bullying Isn't Just Joking Around

The humiliations author Jodee Blanco endured as a child still haunt her.

One time, she found her locker smeared with garbage after she intervened when bullies flicked dirt into the eyes of a disabled child. During another incident, she arrived at school to find her favorite pair of shoes, which she kept in her locker, submerged in a toilet, accompanied by the note, “Everybody hates you, freak.”

“Kids think it’s just joking around,” she said. “But they’re damaging each other for life." 

Blanco emerged from her agonizing childhood to become a successful Hollywood publicist. But after the Columbine shootings in 1999, she said she realized the power her story could have to help others.

The Orland and Palos Park native and author of two books gave four presentations geared toward different audiences Tuesday during a daylong event. She addressed and students during the day, and then spoke with the teachers after school. In the evening, she held a workshop for parents and students.

Cass Principal Paul Bleuher brought Blanco to the District with the help of a $3,000 grant from the Cass 63 Foundation for Educational Excellence. Blanco has written two New York Times bestsellers on bullying and is frequently featured as an expert commentator on CNN, NBC and NPR.

Foundation Chair Mary Sullivan said that her own daughter was blown away by the afternoon presentation.

“She couldn’t stop talking about it after school,” Sullivan said. She said the district’s next step will be to keep that momentum going.

Blanco prefaced her talk for parents by saying that the audience would have to trust her; that her ideas aren’t what you would expect.

What is revolutionary about Blanco’s approach is that she addresses bullying from a child’s perspective—eschewing clichés such as “ignore bullies” or “they’re just jealous” in favor of nurturing and empowering the child at the center of the taunting.

At various points Blanco embodied the characters in her stories, shrinking back into the terrified, teenage version of herself or slouching into the regretful posture of her tormentors when she approached them during her 20th high school reunion.

Remarkably, each bully was genuinely ashamed of his or her high school behavior.

“We didn’t hate you,” said the ringleader, whom Blanco called Nadia. “We wanted to be you.”

One man even asked for Blanco’s help: His own daughter, 14, had tried to kill herself because she was so badly harassed.

Blanco empowered the District 63 children to reach out to others who might seem a little different and befriend them.

“I know you are all courageous, caring, compassionate and true,” Blanco said. “You have to live up to that every day.”

When Blanco asked the parents in the audience whether their children had attended the afternoon assembly, nearly every hand rose. The session impacted some of their children so deeply that they asked to tag along for the evening program, too.

“I was so moved,” said Cass fifth-grader Annie Banks, who attended both the afternoon and evening sessions. “My friend and I just looked at each other, wide eyed." 

The afternoon presentation so stirred Annie that she said she approached a boy who is often left out in the classroom and told him she would try to include him more.

Even though Annie’s sister had Reconciliation Tuesday night, she convinced her mom, Paula, that Blanco’s talk was a must-see event. 

“She came home from school and said, ‘Mom, you have to come,’” Paula said. 

“This was the better bet,” Annie added.

For more information on Blanco's advocacy, visit her website.